In addition to academic difficulties, when adolescence meets attention problems, children tend to show more pronounced behavioral abnormalities and emotional outbursts. Impulsive behavior and hostility almost become the tone of life for this group of children, and some will enjoy taking risks. Adolescent substance abuse, car accidents, and unprotected sex are also more prevalent in children with attention deficit disorders.
Because they always fall short of the expectations of teachers, parents, and even themselves, and because they are determined to work hard but cannot control themselves in many ways, adolescents with attention deficits also often experience depression and anxiety: a lack of motivation because they believe they are worthless and unaccomplished, and a lack of self-loathing because they are always dismissed.
Perhaps these children grew up with criticism and scolding, and low self-esteem persists, becoming more pronounced during the delicate phase of adolescence, a time of restlessness and transformation, which leads to a range of problematic behaviors: addiction to games - satisfying the need for self-esteem by winning in the virtual world; unhealthy eating habits -expressing one's power by overeating or refusing to eat.
We often deny the authenticity of these confessions: "If you have enough perseverance, you can control yourself" - words like these only make children think: Yes, I am a stupid pig without enough perseverance.
What is more important for teenagers is to talk openly and honestly about their real situation and to be accepted by their parents and teachers as they are.
Based on this, there are some strategies that can really help them.
● Talk with your child and set clear, consistent goals and rules with reasonable expectations
● Make a daily planner with your child that has reasonable requirements and specific entries about what needs to be accomplished each day (for help with homework click on The Doctor Told You 丨When it's Time to Step Up! The homework procrastination that drives moms crazy is finally broken!)
● Help your child gain a sense of accomplishment from legitimate hobbies
● Always praise and reinforce good behavior (What? My child doesn't have good behaviors? Look for it, there must be! Look for it all the time!)
● Clearly communicate the consequences of bad behaviors that have occurred and let the child take responsibility for them
● Inform your child in writing of the consequences of possible misbehavior that has not yet occurred, establish rules for punishment, and have them formally signed by both parties
● Maintain a regular routine, using alarm clocks, wall-marked calendars, and set activity areas as reminders
● Control the use of electronic devices, as mentioned above, with a written agreement with your child
● Always stay calm, your outburst is the biggest reason your child can be upset and angry
● Maintain contact and a good relationship with teachers